17 March 2009

Six months

I can't believe it's been half of a year, but it has. So now, I am going to squint a little to bring down the resolution and try to bring you couple truisms.

When we arrived at Heathrow, we had everything in boxes with us. It was a stupid plan that I made to save money, and we spent two hours trying to sort it all out Terminal 5. I remember standing there with all our stuff on carts, Naomi asleep on Yoko's back, with no idea what to do and no one in the country that could help us.

The whole time has felt that way, to varying degrees. There is no one here to help us, and whenever there is a problem, we just have to figure it out. And now, looking back on it, after six months of solving little problems, I feel a sense of pride in it, but I would not choose to do it again and all the desire I had to move again in December is gone. Not that I have fallen in love with England, because I haven't, but I have fallen in love with being in one place for at least three more years, with no pressure to move up or out. I have fallen in love, again, with knowing the aisle where the coffee is in the supermarket.

We've really only had one month where we haven't been living under the pressure of wondering if we'll have enough money, but I have to say, financial stability does buy happiness. People who say money doesn't buy happiness have enough money. Money buys happiness when it removes the concern of living day-to-day. It can't solve your meaning in life problems, true, but it can take away the worry of paying for next week groceries.

I was worried about Yoko the most when we moved. I'm not worried about her any more. She has more friends than I do, is more active than I am, and seems to enjoy things here much more than I do. With that concern off of my shoulders, I feel like I will begin to think about the next baby, and after that, perhaps our next step in life, and after that, my own happiness. But when you have a small child and a pregnant wife, there is nothing worse than thinking about your own happiness and fulfillment. It's neither the time nor the place.

But yesterday was a beautiful day, the first really beautiful day of the year. I walked to the store with Naomi and bought coffee, returned something at the store, and ate Skittles. All this amounts to normalcy for me, and I couldn't be more happy to say, I have a normal life in England with my normal wife and normal daughter.

Now, 7 weeks and 6 days until we have another baby and change all that again...
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