01 September 2010

The end of the day

I have transcribed three videos today and worked on my presentation for next week, so I feel as though I have earned a moment to blog. My blog entries, when I wait like I do for so long, become a potpourri of all the boring bits of my life. I'll try to be brief.

My dataset is growing, but it is looking to be fascinating and multi-facilitated. I'm really pleased with how it is coming together and how I solved this problem. I think my dataset solution is interesting and allowing me the space to find what it was that I am looking for. I have marked about 40 videos now for transcription, and transcribed a good number of them (25%?) already. Once you have the template down, it's easier to do. Then it's just a matter of metaphorically putting your nose to the metaphorical grindstone.

I studied French hard in August and am taking two weeks off. I will study very, very narrowly for the final for two weeks ahead of it, but that's all that I'm going to give to it. Tired of wasting my time on something that is not going to help me at all in the long run.

Last night, at 4 in the morning, I was rocking a screaming Mei and thinking to myself, I feel awful. I have felt awful for about six weeks, as  I have taken on this austerity plan towards my weight. Feeling like I was (I feel a bit better now), I am glad that come next week, I will be on a plane to Aberdeen and not have to think about my lack of eating all the time. When you work alone at your desk, it's very hard to put not eating out of your mind. It's been good to have to do it this way, I suppose, I can learn it. But still. My body feels healthy, but I am weak and tired and ready to be stronger. It's been affecting my outlook on the world too: made me shorter with my wife and kids. It needs to be done: I need to stop hovering around being overweight for the rest of my life, but anyone who tells you that you can lose weight without feeling crappy doesn't know what they're talking about. You will feel crappy. Nature of the beast: your body is eating itself, for god's sake.

But I need to get away next week: clear my head and work on my networking for a job in 2012. I had this vision today, as I took a walk by the river after listening to Christians and atheists argue all day, of getting a job in a new department that will be opening that year and securing a position this year. It would take so much stress away. It won't happen, but... a girl can dream.

I shouldn't complain. We are on target. I survived August despite not getting the pay from Birmingham I had expected: now I will have a good couple of months financially, minus of course the needs of the car and the trip, but I realised that our trip to Spain is a vacation. I shouldn't count it as a cost: it's a chosen expenditure because of the work I'm doing. It's for our enjoyment--we're doing it because we can afford it. Spending money on enjoyment once a year is not a bad thing. It's not getting the car fixed. It's not a new visa. I need to be more positive.

I wanted to blog all day, but I have lost all my thoughts and energy. Oh well, one more week and I'll feel better. I promise.
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