08 January 2004

"I mean, we're just friends."

Everyone: Joe Gibbs is returning to football to coach the Redskins.

Also, from my new favorite idiot celebrity, former husband of Britney Spears (from the New York Times):
And now, while Ms. Spears slinks behind a wall of publicists, her erstwhile husband, Jason Allen Alexander, is left with the paparazzi on his front lawn. 
"I'm getting really aggravated with all this!" Mr. Alexander shouted this week to a gaggle of journalists hanging around for a quote. "I want y'all off my property!" 
Ever since Ms. Spears got an annulment on Monday for the impulsive ceremony at the Little White Wedding Chapel in Las Vegas, in which she wore ripped jeans and a baseball cap, Mr. Alexander, football star and son of an auto mechanic, has been cooped up in his house, ringed by tabloid reporters from across the planet, occasionally sticking his thick neck out the door to shoo people away. 
Mr. Alexander, meanwhile, has gone underground, though he emerged to talk to "Access Hollywood" and gave this account of his wedding night: "We were like this is a real pretty, beautiful night. It was cool and we were looking at each other and we were like, `Let's do something wild and crazy and let's go get married just for the hell of it.' " 
Later, in the "Access Hollywood" interview, he was asked if he wanted to marry her, for real.
"Definitely," he said. Then he caught himself. "I mean, we're just friends."
Well, he's a moron.