26 February 2010

I can haz indie cred?

I think this Hipster Kitten meme is very funny and ties into my experience last night, traveling to Newport Pagnell with P and K to hear hipsters with beards play djembes. P is here from Eastern Europe and staying at our home. This is very nice for me as we are good friends and I have very few good friends in England, so we can talk and make plans for Yoko and the girls and I to go to Budapest sometime later this year. P also got me out of the house past my bedtime last night to go to an open mic night, populated by OU students (none, seemingly, from the same country as the other) and hipsters playing bad hipster music. I sat on the floor, drinking Pepsi as I was trying to avoid the adult beverages for the sake of my ailing urinary tract. I sat among all the OU people whom I had never met as they are all, though older than me, still childless and (for the most part) spouseless, leaving them free to enjoy the nightlife.

I felt guilty the whole time, thinking of Yoko in bed with the kids. I was skipping out on my duties and for something I couldn't find myself genuinely enjoying. I'm only 27, I thought: why do I feel like I don't fit in here. These are my people. There were beards everywhere I, noticed, and at least one ironic and one genuine mustache.

Once you have been married, you think about how free it must be to be single, but watching everyone interact, I was struck by how happy I was that I didn't need to concern myself with possibilities of whom I may or may not connect with. It was such a nuance, I remember, I never really enjoyed dating and spent most of my time single time trying to avoid it. Now that I am married, searching for potential partners takes up none of my energy. I was happy about this the more I thought about it. The trade-off of marriage is, for me, a very good deal. Perhaps I'll go out again in five or six months.