17 February 2012

Diet tips for sinners

I'm testing some html/tagging stuff with my blog and going to see if I can snag someone searching this exact phrase. Here are my tips, fatty:

  • You're not a sinner—you're just another guy/gal trying to make sense of the world like the rest of us.
  • You're eating too much. You know how I can tell? You searched 'diet tips for sinners'. 
  • Exercise is great. You need to exercise. But until you get a handle on what you're putting in your mouth, you're screwed. Sorry. You can only exercise so much. That's a key entry in my 'diet tips for sinners' list.
  • Balance what you eat. This is one of the most important 'diet tips for sinners'. Eat less, eat right.
  • So, you've been unimpressed with these 'diet tips for sinners'? You were hoping for something else? How about this: eat more protein. 
Look, these 'diet tips for sinners' are not magic, but they are a starting point. Try googling 'Bible verses for weight loss'. You might find something about getting wings like an eagle or something.