14 June 2012

On coming/going home

I went home to the States last week for my sister's wedding. Going back to the States is always a mixed bag, but this time was okay. Mostly good. Almost all good.

The wedding itself was beautiful, the maths literate younger sister also beautiful in the way that only she could be. I stood up there in front of everyone as a groomsmen, watching it happening and thinking about almost nothing. Not surreal. Very real. They kissed and the ceremony finished and it was like it had always been.

There's so much to say about the whole thing but so difficult to put into words.

Travelling with kids: better this time than in the past. I said to Yoko that we were at the end of the very difficult travelling years. Naomi is now old enough to help, not just get in the way. She tried to stay asleep on the plane rather than trying to stay awake. Mei could be reasoned with and slept well for portions of the trip. I saw a future where they ordered their own meals, cut their own chicken, and let me read American Way in peace.

I woke up early this morning, exhausted, but determined to run. I came home, had a job interview on Skype and then slept again before going to work. I got little done today, just a little reorientation. I am 80% of the way. I just need to get to the end over the next couple of months. A draft will go to my supervisors by the end of next month. Hopefully that will be something that passes the mark. Then I submit. Then I... well, that sentence ends there. I don't know what happens next. Something happens.

The night of the wedding, I bought an iPad. I am blogging on it now actually. I quite like it. I have wanted one for so long and Yoko has continually encouraged me to just get one. I did. I got the iPad 2 and a case, spending more than I wanted to, but have been thus far impressed with it. Even typing this post, I don't feel as though I am really losing any time with my thoughts. It's nice, actually. Really nice. I just need to get over the feeling of being selfish. Yes, it is selfish. But sometimes that's okay. The kids love it though. Naomi used it to send an email to grandma. I think I will get my money's worth from it.

 Now to run another eight miles in the morning and have the rest of this—this thesis, this year, this life—start to come together. The next chapter is due on 26 June. Mia's birthday and a day before my thirtieth. What will this summer/autumn bring? I'm not sure. But the future, I hope, is bright.