I have a job interview for a teaching fellowship at a very good Russell Group university with a very good English department on Monday, and I must give a presentation including a model class. Although I can put on my best confidence man trousers when I need to (and I will, I'm sure, for the actual interview), I'm a bit anxious, and now I've been dreaming about it, but the dreams have had a very odd sequence of events. Last night's:
- I am teaching the model class, but it's actually a real class at Middlesex, with real students and none of the interview committee is there.
- What, why am I in my underwear? Oh god, I forgot to get dressed. Luckily, no one seems to notice.
- Now, I just have to get my presentation to work, but the computer isn't working.
- Wait, why is my boss from Middlesex here? And those cameras? They're taping this?
- The computer still isn't working, I've been trying to get it to work for almost 20 minutes now. Screw it, I'll just teach the lesson.
- Oh wait, the committee IS here, and they're playing the roles of unruly kids in a class, just like that one time in Japan when I was training to teach kids for the first time and I didn't know what to do.
- Everyone's talking, I can't get them to stop--maybe I'll shout.
- God, now everyone thinks I've lost my cool: they're glaring at me, I blew it.
- Wait, now, I'm trying to run in the rain and I can't move forward? Where did everyone go? Why am I still in my underwear? Why do I keep slipping on the pavement? Why can't I get any traction?
- Mia's crying: why is she out here in the rain...
Monday, please come quickly: